Life After Hoarding

I'm starting a new blog. I don't know why. It's not as if I don't have a bunch of abandoned accounts and unfinished projects scattered across a multitude of sites. But I have a story to tell and in the vastness of the internet, I have a place to tell it.

I'm a college graduate living in a cute, yellow house with my boyfriend and our two dogs. I keep a pretty clean house, but it is still -- according to all the people who have visted -- "homey".

This is going to be a blog about that blurry line between "homey" and "hoardy" that I'm so scared to cross. This is a blog about the home I haven't lived in in five years. The home that's going on the market in two months and how I will have to return to go through my own room. This is going to be a blog about learning how to clean a home for the first time at 23. This will be a blog about the stupid things my brother and I did to keep from drowning in our own home. This blog will be about mental health, organizing, cleaning, and confronting the parts of myself that scare me.

I've escaped where I used to live and I've spent a long time pretending it didn't exist, but I've come to realize that to truly move on I must face my past and learn from it. And so this is my tale of my life after hoarding.

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Cleaning

I called my mom today to chat (I need to plan out creative ideas for work and I think better when I talk it through). She accidentally switched the call to FaceTime so I zoomed in on my dogs and had her looking at my hot pink socks while I wandered around the house. Yesterday was trash day, so I went through the fridge and emptied everything out, trashing old stuff and cleaning out the shelves. I reorganized so that all the veggies were on top, within easy grabbing reach (since then I've realized that apparently you're not supposed to do that because you'll go to eat some cucumber and it will be frozen, but that's besides the point). Since I was on FaceTime with my mom and I thought my fridge looked pretty, I decided to show it to her. She was impressed. But she also said to me – so cavalierly I couldn't believe it, "I don't clean my fridge, but that's nice." And she laughed. She laughed . I know she doesn't clean her fridge. I lived w...

Chores

As a kid I used to hate doing chores. But come on, who didn't? The only chore I liked was dusting and that was because I liked the smell of Lemon Pledge. But anything else I hated and didn't think I should have to do. My parents were divorced and I spent time at two different homes which led me to lack any feeling of ownership over the space. I felt like I was doing someone else's chores. But now, as an adult in her own space, I love my chores. But they weren't enforced when I was little so there is so much that I do not know. I had no concept of how frequently I was supposed to do my chores, everything I know I've learned from extensive googling of what's "normal" and asking my friends. Here's my chore breakdown: Dishes -- after every meal Vacuum downstairs -- every other day Vacuum upstairs -- twice a week Make bed -- daily Wash sheets -- every 1-2 weeks Wash towels -- every 1-2 weeks Deep clean one room -- 1-2 times a week Cle...

So this is that weekend. I'm supposed to go up to the house and say goodbye to it and clear out all my stuff. I am not looking forward to it at all. But it might not happen this weekend. The roads are wicked icy apparently -- or they're going to be. There are two different routes I could go with it: John's Plan My boyfriend, John, comes home from work tonight. We go to bed super early (like seven o'clock). We wake up at 4am (ugh) and drive 4.5 hours to my house. We do something (????) with the dogs. We clean from 10am until we're finished. John expects 4-6 hours. Then we drive home. If we get started at 5, we should be here around 9-10pm. We sleep all Sunday, get up to watch the game, probably sleep some more. Pros: fast, gets it done with quickly, little time for feelings, can sleep all the next day Cons: little time for feelings, John drives 9 hours in one day (and cleans and puts up with me) Jacob's Plan My brother, Jacob, drives from my house ...

Life Beyond Hoarding

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